A to Z, 2012-- P is for...

Pain.

Ah yes, my standard picture of pain. The Dread Pirate Roberts has returned!

Before things got too far removed, I just wanted to say thank you, to those who took time out of their day to wish me well.

The new medication (the one mentioned a few days ago) has been incredibly helpful. I'm not quite up to my normal speed, but it is indeed helping to keep my elevated pain levels under control.

I'm not so happy with the world spinning, as a side effect, but when I raised my concern about this, my doctor pointed out an interesting fact. "You're already not able to do anything when things get bad," he said, "But with this, at least you'll feel some pain relief while you're not able to do much!"

Touche, doc. Touche.

Anyway, this was not the "P" word that I had in mind. I have another word that I'll be talking more about tomorrow, in conjunction with the letter "Q". Or perhaps separately. I haven't decided yet.

See you then~!

A to Z, 2012-- O is for...

The OCEAN!

This photo (Copyright TJ Wasik) was taken by one of my best friends, on a trip to the USVI. The water was such a gorgeous color of blue!

So those of you who know me, know that I'm a water-baby through and through. Even though I was the slowest child on earth to learn how to swim (I don't think I took my swimmies off until I turned seven!), I've always loved being in the water and I practically grew up in the ocean.

Look at me-- a nautical natural! Ahoy, mateys and Mickeys! Of course I look like a natural on the water... I am a Cancer, after all, and that makes me a crab baby! Just look at those "claws", expertly holding onto my food~

See, my grandparents had a boat. Every summer, I would visit them-- sometimes with my mom and dad and brother, sometimes on my own. We would ride over to a nearby barrier island, park in the marina, and stay for as long as we liked. There was the bay (shown above, older my shoulder), there was the ocean (not pictured above), there was sand as far as the eye could see. We had boogie boards and money for ice cream cones, and when I was tired of playing in the water there were parks next to the marina, with swings and slides and monkey bars.

The ocean was where I got to spend time with my family and read as many books as I liked. But most importantly, the ocean was where I learned not just how to make jewelry, but where I grew to love it and learned how to sell it!

(I'll talk more about that at a later date. If I put it in this blog post, it would be longer than some of Hemmingway's short stories!)

In any case, the ocean is a place that fills me with joy. When I am there, I am filled with a warm and blissful calm. When I am thinking about it, I can't help but smile.

And most importantly for this blog, it inspires me artistically.

A to Z, 2012-- D is for...

Decisions.

We make decisions every day, every single one of us. Chefs, healers, doctors, mothers, engineers, teachers, athletes, movie stars, musicians, cashiers, day laborers, and yes, artists. It doesn't matter if we are rich or poor, happy or sad, strong or weak, we all make decisions every single day.

Morpheus and Neo know where it's at! What'll it be-- the red pill or the blue pill?

Some decisions are small, so small you don't even have to think about it-- for example, what music you will listen to on your commute. Others are made so often that they become part of a routine-- like what you will put in your coffee, or how you will style your hair, or what you do first in the morning after you wake up. Some decisions are new every day, but require some thought-- what to wear, what to cook, what you will do after work is over.

And some decisions we must make are so tremendously huge that they consume your thoughts and your life.


I'm at one of those crucial crossroads right now... and I have been for quite some time now.


When I first got sick, the question was whether I should have surgery or not. I weighed the options, and had the surgery. While it didn't give me any relief from the pain, it gave me something that I didn't have before-- an answer.


When I realized that teaching was out of the question for me, I had to figure out what to do with my life. That took quite a long time, but I eventually realized that I actually could "make it" as an artist. A life-changing decision, most definitely-- and while I question my choice all the time, I absolutely love what I am doing.

See? This might not be the best photo of me, but there's no doubt about it that I am happy to be making jewelry. Notice the earrings hidden by my hair, the bracelet designed by me, and the necklace designed by Hubby. I look like I'm ready to take on anything. Look out world, here I come~!

Yesterday, at the doctor's office, I talked to a new doctor. A specialist in his field, quite literally world-renowned. I now have some major choices to make about my treatment~ the decisions I make will affect my entire life's course, so I will have to think long and hard about my course of action.

Today, my decision was to buy a new earring stand for my jewelry display. I needed something that was more fun, and more functional, than the one that I was previously using. 

Apparently, in my universe, earrings grow on trees from the roots of bracelets... I'm practically a psycho-analysts' dream come true!

I love the tree, but am not so fond of the butterfly on top. I will probably be replacing it with something else, at some point in time.


Tomorrow's biggest decision will hopefully be nothing more than what to eat for lunch, or what components to put together for a necklace that I'm designing. The truly tough decisions will be on my mind for some time to come, because they are not the kind of choices that one makes in an instant. It's not every day that we are faced with the "big ones"-- and thank goodness for that.


See you all tomorrow, for the letter E, and don't forget to sign up for my giveaway, a few posts back. Don't forget that it is the love and support from my family and friends that has made me as strong as I am today-- and I consider all of you my friends <3

A to Z, 2012-- B is For...

BLUE!

But first, a quick welcome to any new visitors I might have from the A to Z challenge-- and a reminder to all visitors, old and new, to sign up for my very first giveaway! Now that I've taken care of that bit of business...

Those who know me should not surprised that for me, as an artist, B stands for blue. Not just any blue-- Royal Blue.

I could have used the photos from MY wedding, since our color was Royal blue, but this was just way easier~!

Aw, hell, I might as well share one photo from my wedding! Pay no attention to the oversized bridal train, gorgeous as it may be. Look instead to the color worn by my bridesmaids-- yes, that blue-ish blur next to the beautiful big white thing.

This color of blue is near and dear to my heart for reasons I could never put into words. I even have several clothing items in Royal Blue~ a jacket, a skirt, a pair of shoes, a pair of earrings, a turtleneck, short sleeved tee-shirt...

I have NO IDEA what I'm running towards in this photo of myself from last year, but I think it has something to do with a fight between some cousins. I am the oldest, after all! All I know is that I'm NOT running from the all-in-black monster behind me. That's just one of the other "little" cousins, sillies, blacked out because he's still a "kid." Don't remind me that he's taller than I am...

Oh yes. And a royal blue sun dress. Only to be worn with the silliest of faces, of course.

A dear friend of mine told me that my strongest chakra is the throat. To those of you as ignorant as I was,  this means that my strengths lie in communication with others and expression of ideas, both expressive and receptive. It relates to creativity and the act of creating, and listening on all levels: to my own intuition, to those around me, and to the universe that surrounds me. Metaphorically speaking I wear many "hats", and as I write all of this, I realized that every one of them somehow relates to these ideas~ Artist... Musician... Fashion Designer... Teacher... Counselor... Blogger/Writer... Event Planner... the list goes on, but you get the idea.

And wouldn't you know it, the color of that chakra is blue.

Now I KNOW that someone out there is wondering what in tarnation this all has to do with my art.

The answer is unbelievably simple: I have an addiction to creating all things that are blue.

I absolutely ADORE my bead supplier (Suma in New York City) for having such a gorgeous wall. And for letting me take a photo of it, no less~!

Since I'm so drawn to blue shades, I always work extra hard to NOT create things in the color-- or better put, I experiment with other colors much more, because I don't want to have a jewelry line with no other color options. Sometimes it works and I end up with a nice variety of color options; other times, I go too far in the opposite direction and create NOTHING that is blue. But I always try to find that balance, despite my love affair with my absolute favorite color.

Do any of you have a color that "speaks" to you?

Day Thirty, Time to Party!

Cheers from both myself and Hubby~!

  ...Okay, so it's not a perfect rhyme, but it's more fitting than anything else I could think of.

Today we celebrate the (almost) end of my month of earrings. I have one day left, but I couldn't think of a more fitting time to throw a mini-party with my readers. See, I have reached over 1,000 page views to this blog. I am almost up to 50 posts. And I'm starting up a new post-a-day challenge as of Sunday!

Today's post kills two birds with one stone, metaphorically speaking. My earring-of-the-day is part of the special giveaway that I've been hinting about for a while now. SURPRISE!

 

First, the materials. The black beads are glass (the smaller ones) and ceramic (the REALLY small ones on the earrings, and the larger round ones), and the colorful beads are made by myself, out of comic book paper. Archie, to be specific-- I wanted that "retro" feel. Coated in Mod Podge, of course, to make them a bit more water resistant. The ear wires are made from Sterling Silver, so you can wear them without fear of the dreaded "green skin" syndrome!

One lucky winner will get both the earrings and the bracelet. Leave a comment on this post for your chance to win-- I'll be choosing the name at random on Sunday, April 8th, around 12 PM (aka "Noon") Eastern Standard Time, so be sure to put your name in before then!

I'll be announcing the winner on the blog, so I STRONGLY recommend that you follow the blog in some way (either Google Friend Connect or Linky Followers or RSS or whatever you choose). If the prize remains unclaimed after a reasonable amount of time (I'm not talking one day late, guys!), I'll draw a different name.

I'm super excited to be offering these items to all of you. Please don't hesitate to ask if there are any questions about this. Good luck, godspeed, and thank you for helping to make this blog as amazing as it is! I "luff" you all, as one of my friends often says <3

Day Twenty-Four, It Never Rains But it Pour(s)

So much has been going on with me lately, not the least of which has been my health. Endometriosis is always a yo-yo... sometimes it's up, sometimes it's down. I've spent over a week now with elevated pain levels, and there's nothing to be done about it. I'm still making my earrings every day, and I'm still putting together posts every day, but it's hard for them to actually get put *up* every day.

Thankfully, I have an amazing family and supportive friends, who understand what is going on and have been giving me some LOVELY recommendations for things to watch while I'm bed-ridden! I just finished watching every single episode of "Bones" available on Netflix, and am working my way through the first season of Downton Abbey. Next up, I'm going to finish "United States of Tara"~ is there anything else out there that you think I absolutely have to see?

Anyway, onto the earrings.

A friend suggested that I name them after her-- "Yosie's Choice"-- because they're her kind of style~!

Sterling Silver spacers surround and separate two delicate pink beads-- one perfectly round freshwater pearl, and one cool and smooth rose quartz.

Still experimenting with different photo surfaces...

I don't know what I'd do without this teacup!

I have some exciting news to post, both on here and the business blog. Stay tuned!

Day Twenty-One, A Tale Has Been Spun

As much as I love making a pair of earrings every single day, there are some days when I'm sick and only have enough energy for a single project. I am very happy that I challenged myself in this way, and I'm even happier with the results~ but I'll be glad to have the time to make other things!

Today's earrings were created to match a necklace that Hubby made, called "Fish Kisses." I'll post a photo of the necklace when he stops holding all the jewelry hostage...

As my high school Spanish teacher would say, it's all about the "Escoochi Smoochi"~!

With garnet hearts, and freshwater pearls that are shaped like fish, this whimsical design is equal parts classy and fun!

Hubby and I have crazy nicknames for each other-- it's truly a long story as to how they came about, and even if I had the time to tell you, I'm pretty sure it's one of those "had to be there" moments. Perhaps one day I'll figure out how to explain the story... but for now, suffice to say that one of the pet names that we call each other is "Fish."


It's a term of endearment.

I'm not going to lie, I had WAY too much fun "posing" the earrings for this photo!

Anyway, Hubby found these beads at our supply shop, and he knew right away that he had to get them. The hearts, he knew, could be used for many designs because they coordinated so well with many different stones and colors. In fact, you all saw them the other day, matched up with the rose quartz beads!

The fish, on the other hand, he knew would be used for something special-- as he told me the day he got them, they are just as fun, and almost as unique, as the woman who would be using them. Such a charmer, he is. And so smart, too~ he knows which hand is going to toss pellets into the tank, metaphorically speaking!

This design is special to me, because it is an enduring symbol of our love for each other. Like the fish in the earrings, I want to stay together forever as a pair, showing our love and affection until the end of time itself.

Thank you for all the love you give me, my darling Fish <3

Tree Wings Studio Giveaway, Times Three!!!

We interrupt this regularly scheduled blog for a quick commercial announcement...

Rebekah, over at Tree Wings Studio, is sponsoring an amazing giveaway! She is giving away three different sets of her beads to three lucky winners... so generous! All three are amazingly gorgeous, but my absolute favorite one has to be her "Sunshine and Rainbows" beads.

She'll be announcing the winner on March 22, so keep those appendages crossed~! And send me all the good karma/prayers/vibes/rubber chickens you can spare.

Day Fifteen... My Energy is Lean...

Today was very fun, and incredibly busy, but not too productive. One of my very dear friends came over today for what we call "Girly Crafty Day"-- a day where we sit and talk and create whatever inspires us that day!

Or, better put, we originally INTENDED to have said "Girly Crafty Day."

Instead, we ended up watching a documentary (one of my favorites-- "Babies"!) and some TV episodes (introduced her to "Bones")... then we grabbed a quick bite to eat and had a day of leisurely browsing. I talked to one store about potentially selling our jewelry, and bought three really cool books from the local used book store. I'll post about them quite soon~

In any case, here are the earrings for today. This pair is a little different than anything else I've made-- I used two translucent white seed beads and one large black angular seed bead to accent beautiful coral beads. I was lucky to find two pieces of approximately the same size and thickness and color-- almost as lucky as the person who will eventually get to wear them!

Yo-HO-HO and a... box of cigars?

They kind of look like dutch shoes here...

And like a skirt here. Such versatility!

As you can see, the camera is all better now-- hip Hip HOORAY!-- so I'll be taking LOTS of photos tomorrow. Yay! *waves flag*

Hope everyone is having a great week so far... one more day is through!

Day Twelve- I Truly Delve!

So, first things first~ the earrings of the day!

Today's pair is a special request from a friend of mine. These are brass wires, wrapped in a spiral, and ending in an onyx teardrop. I plaon recreating these in sterling silver quite soon~ and while I know that you all think the model is OH SO ATTRACTIVE, this photo doesn't show the detail as well as I'd like... so more photographs will be attached tomorrow.

And now for something completely different.

I wanted to thank all my friends and family, and those who have visited me here, for being so supportive. Since posting about my health a couple weeks ago, I have received so much love from so many people, both on here and in real life. It means the world to me, and keeps me smiling when things get hard. Since then, as always, I have had good days and bad days... and the thing that keeps me going when things get tough is the idea that I will always have people in my life who support what I do.

When Hubby and I were watching Star Trek: Voyager on Netflix, and reliving our youth, the Vulcan character (Tuvok) said something that truly resonated within me. I was surprised to enjoy a quote from this particular character, since I am pretty much the anti-Vulcan for the most part.

"Do not mistake composure for ease." 

My life has challenges, but I always try to hold myself together as well as I can. I always try to keep my head up, and keep going. Many people say that they would never have known that I was unwell, had I not told them. I don't like to complain, and I don't enjoy showing my weaknesses to people. Some seem to think that because I don't show these feelings, that I'm perfectly fine.

Even when I'm at my worst-- no, ESPECIALLY when I'm feeling my worst-- I always try to make things seem much better than they truly are.

This does not mean that I feel any less unwell... just that I try to hold myself together as best I can. And the two things that truly help me to do that, are the important people in my life, and my art. Those two things help me keep my composure through the worst of times.

What inspires *you* to keep going, when all you want to do is stop? <3

My Pain, My Creativity, My Life

So, faithful readers, I apologize for not putting up a post in so long. This is, quite literally, the first day in over a week and a half that I have not felt completely unwell. I'm not saying that I feel FABULOUS today, but at least I'm not on death's door...


Last week, Lori (a fellow jewelry blogger, whom I follow for her beautiful work and lovely personality) wrote up a lengthy post that I truly connect with with my entire heart and soul... it is titled "Pain Versus Creativity."

See? Even the Dread Pirate Roberts understands... you should all know the caption that is associated with this photo~

The truth is, my health is frequently an issue that, until this point, I have frequently swept under the metaphorical mat. I tried not to talk about it because the more one talks about things, the more "real" they become... and this is a reality that I wanted about as much as one wants dental surgery! I have told some number of family members and friends about the details of my health, but this is the first time that I have spoken out to the community at large.

Now, I don't intend to throw a pity-party-- no one likes those-- but when I read Lori's post, I found myself crying from the emotion of someone writing down EXACTLY how I feel about things. The idea that someone else out there understands how I feel, and put in a public forum, gave me the courage to write about my situation.

I have what is known as an Adhesive Disorder, caused by Endometriosis. The situation that I am in is quite complicated, so for now I will hold off on the exact details of what is going on with my body. I'm not ashamed to tell my story, but it's so complicated that it will take much more than a single blog post. For today, though, I will tell you all what this means for me, and how it affects my life.

I am in chronic pain. Many people use the word, but few mean it quite the way that I do. I am in pain, quite literally, every second of every day-- from the moment I open my eyes in the morning, until I go to sleep at night. Pain that wakes me up in the night, from a sound sleep. Pain so severe I cry from it. Pain so excruciating that recovery from surgery is less painful than what I deal with on a day-to-day basis. Pain so unbearable that a bikini wax seems like a gentle tap by comparison. Pain so debilitating that it's hard to move around without limping severely.

Pain that will potentially stay with me for the rest of my life.

Pain that caused me to completely abandon a career path-- teaching-- that I absolutely loved.

A painting by a former student. I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure the one in the middle is me... and yes, I still have all the artwork from my years in the classroom. I wouldn't give up that "porfolio" for anything!

The reason that Lori's post resonated so strongly within me, is because of the words she used. "Invisible pain made me feel like an invisible person -- hiding out in a dark room, being deprived of all the things I love to do." Never were truer words spoken.

My health touches my entire life... career, friendships, finances, social outings, even my passions. There are days that I need to tell friends that I don't feel well enough to see them. There are days when I don't leave my bed at all, and I can't even knit because of the pain. Days when I can't go down to my studio and paint, or make a necklace, because it requires too much movement. In many ways I have become an "invisible" woman, especially on those days when no one sees me.

Now, I know that I am a very lucky lady. I am blessed to have an opportunity to stay home and create beautiful things. I have been gifted with an artists' soul, and the ability to create works of art. I can do anything that I set my mind to do, and I have a (hopefully long) lifetime ahead of me to do just that. I am not happy about my situation-- I don't know that I ever will-- but I am gradually coming to terms with what I have to deal with. I continue to move forward, because there is no going back to how things were before.

In closing today, I am again borrowing Lori's words, from her post regarding pain. She told her readers, "Don't be afraid to share your story.  Don't be afraid to hide your story.  Either way, the point is to make your soul more peaceful in whatever way you feel comfortable, and to be gentle with yourself." I will add to these words of wisdom, something that Lori mentioned, but in my own words. Something I tell people when they are in need.

No one is ever truly alone. Seek out people who truly care; help carry their burdens in life, and they will help you carry theirs. To all you out there, who are dealing with your own troubles and pains... you are not alone. <3